Tuesday, 1 May 2007

Upstairs Living

Brace yourselves for the most controversial and insightful blog ever to grace the thisisjonny.blogspot.com/ domain....

Prior to now, I have not divulged to the blogosphere (I think that's somewhere between the stratosphere and the atmosphere) the fact that my room on res. this year is Upstairs. Not a major revelation, unless you are familiar with Res workings here at Mt. Helen. The units here consist of 12 rooms, 6 upstairs and 6 downstairs. In a mathematically perfect world this would mean 6 boys downstairs and 6 girls upstairs. But as those of you that've ever woken up before 8am would know, we don't live in a perfect world. So I'm living upstairs with 5 other girls. While I could say many things about living alongside the opposite gender, for the time being I wish to concentrate of the peculiarities of the upstairs bathroom. Now I know you're all expecting & waiting for one issue in particular now that I've mentioned this, but it really won't hurt you consumers to wait a moment for your fill of blogging gratification. That topic is last.

  1. Hair in the Sink - I walked into the bathroom one day & discovered hair in one of the 2 sinks. Not unusual in my past, but as the only male frequenting this room, I was a little perplexed as to how this hair had appeared. You see, I had not shaved at that sink at any time in the past 2 days. (Any longer than that & it probably would've been cleaned)
  2. My logical brain struggled for solutions:
    • Underarm Hair? No girl would do that publicly.
    • Facial Hair? Mine was still on my face.
    • Arm hair? The day I see a girl with arm hairs that thick... I'll be scared.
    • Leg hair? How is it possible to do that?
    • Head hair? The smallness of the hairs would hardly warrant that much effort.
Answer: I learnt a few days later that it's possible to shave your legs in a sink if you sit on the bench. While it's not confirmed, this is the most likely explanation.

  1. Splash back - Now we come to the toilet. No waitup, it's not that topic yet. But I generally go to the toilet standing up, whenever I can. So imagine my horror, when on one of those occasions when I'm unable to go standing up, I spot some droplets of.... liquid on the toilet seat. Again, mostly males get the blame for this, but I know for a fact that it wasn't mine!!!!!! My logical brain didn't even try to understand this one. Guys can misfire, but girls..... AHHHH!
Answer: I've since discovered that occasionally after flushing, some water will splash out onto the bowl. Again, this is the likely explanation. But there are others.....
  1. Toilet Seat - Here you go, this is what you where all waiting for. Surprisingly, this hadn't been an issue until last week sometime. When a green sign with black writing appeared at about eye-level above the Toilet: "If you pee standing up, can you please remember to put the toilet seat down." Why? If the issue is touching the place that numerous people have had their bare bottoms, I have to do it to pee. It's fair that if they expect me to put it down, I expect them to put it up. I used to think that the issue was seeing whatever wasn't flushed down last time. But that isn't the case here, as there isn't a lid. Just a seat. So there is no resolution for this one as yet. Time for me to go make a sign of my own.......


Turtle on 1 May 2007 at 7:27 pm said...

Oh dear Jonny boy-

Issue one: Hair in the sink. You forgot to comment on the fact that we have numerous signs telling us to save water. Hence, the shaving in the sink thing- commendation goes to the girl who did that!

A girl would shave her arms in the bathroom, but I would think she would be wearing a tank top at the time- or, some girls I know do shave in their underwear. It doesn't become an issue when you live so close to other females- seen one pair, seen them all!

But the toilet thing- I, can admit when I was a kid, I wanted to be able to pee standing up. It didn't work out. I only got to a crouch over the toilet backwards thing...but as I say, it didn't work out.

I think you should make a sign that says "Do something that scares you everyday- today's challenge: "Try peeing standing up".

The thing is, I agree with you. If I could pee standing up, I'd willingly put the seat back up. But here's my theory: as the outnumbered male, you don't get that luxury. Not with 5 females around.

And can you please tell me why guys have this thing about not cleaning up their after dribble? Seriously. Please.


PI007 on 1 May 2007 at 11:42 pm said...

With the whole who should put the toilet seat up or down, I reckon that if males have to put it back down each time, then the females should put it up. That way both genders have to consider the other gender each time.


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